Self Help

Where do you begin…

1. Get a glimpse into your inner world

You may find yourself in a disagreement with your partner, family member, friend or colleague.

Problems can arise from a misunderstanding or from a conflict of interest. However, it may also be caused by a difference in your personalities. An awareness of these differences can shine a light on your own behaviour and that of your partner.

Check out this site to get acquainted with how we process our experience emotionally: https://atlasofemotions.org/

Also, this free online personality test is a fun way to get your journey to self discovery under way.

Quick Tips

• Know your differences and preferences
• Considers each other’s worldview
• Take responsibility for your thoughts, words and actions
• Recognise your expectations of yourself and your partner
• Know yourself and you will know what to do

From

Judgement

Blame
Shame
Criticism

From

To

Observation

Ask
Listen
Learn

From

Ignorance

Assumptions
Empty promises
False expectations

From

To

Awareness

Recognition
Appreciation
Gratitude

Observation – Awareness – Change

2. Ask yourself

How much do you value your life?
Is your time important for you to enjoy it or are you feeling worthless?
Are you feeling empowered by always having various options to choose from or are you feeling stuck in some way where you are doing things out of obligation and expectations?
We are only here for a while, so every time you feel anything less than what how you want to feel, ask yourself, ‘is it worth it’?

3. Get in touch

So you have done the test and looked into your feelings and emotions. Some of it has resonated with you, but what now? It can be fun, but how do you apply it in your everyday life? I have been through this process and I know how difficult it can be to relate something that you’ve learnt to your everyday life.
If you are interested in exploring your discoveries, send me a message and we can chat about it 🙂

Share your self-discovery

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100% confidential • no obligation • no commitment

Join Our Community

I would like to invite you to the group which I created for people who are experiencing struggles in their relationships and would like some help.
You are welcome to share your story with the group or send me a pm if you prefer.

Visit Group

I would like to share with you authors who helped me in my journey, so they may also help you find answers in their books.

Dale Carnegie – How To Stop Worrying And Start Living

This was one of my first books. My dad recommended it to me when I was 17 years old. It definitely played a huge role in directing my thinking towards self.

Louise Hay

Of course, she is on this list 🙂 I have a lot of her books, but I always seemed to just read little bits here and there, rather than go through each book cover to cover.
I must say that in the beginning, the idea of affirmations seemed like telling a lie to myself, so I ignored that part for some time. Now, years later I have grown to realise that our whole life is a story we tell ourselves, so why not make it a good one 🙂

Marshall Rosenberg – Nonviolent Communication (NVC)

This is the man that changed my perception of the world of humans. The fascinating aspect of his teachings is how simple are his concepts and how it took me 7 months listening to his video workshop pretty much full time to start recognising them in myself and in the interactions with others. Then, it took me a few years of applying them in my relationships to understand how they work.
At the age of 15, I did not have the tools and the knowledge to manage all that has come my way, so I did the only thing I could (without realising it), which was to suppress ALL of my feelings. The logic that remained took me on the journey of understanding life, but when it came to living it, well, I missed out on that quite a bit.
It was not until some years ago that I had a pleasure of living with a couple that prioritised their feelings in the present moment above all. Just by being themselves, they reminded me that I also have feelings and that I can express them – WAW, what a revelation it was. Around the same time, my other friend introduced me to Marshal’s NVC, which helped me deal with all my previously suppressed feelings in an educated way.
Now, his concepts are a foundation for my work with couples, helping them find understanding and take a step towards creating harmonious relationships.

Paul Ekman – Emotions Revealed

There was a tv series called ‘Lie To Me’ that really caught my attention. It was based on the research of Paul Ekman into the universality of emotions and how they are expressed through our faces and body language. It went along really well with the rediscovery of my feelings. I have read his book, printed the photos and covered my whole bedroom wall with them. Now, there is also a website: https://atlasofemotions.org/ that is very interactive and educating at the same time.

Joe Navarro – What Every Body Is Saying

This was a natural progression in my learning of how our internal world is manifesting through our bodies.

Having explored the body head to toe through chiropractic, I was now able to bring it all together to help me better understand myself and see people for who they are.
Now, what to do with this knowledge, was a whole different story. I wanted to use everything I’ve learnt to help others. And, seeing how my conscious life began with my family falling apart, it is deeply personal and also very much fulfilling for me to be able to help people save their relationships or separate on good terms, so that their children would be in a better place and would be able to experience the joys that this life has to offer.